Bobby Hennan is a broadcast journalist

Bobby The Brain HennanBobby Hennan and Gorilla Monsoon hold the keys to my youth. I listened to their voices for hours and hours on end as a kid, and watching old WWF clips really takes me back immediately to being a kid. With the news of Bobby Hennan recovering after throat surgery, it got me thinking about some of his greatest quotes, some of while I will share right now:

Brain : (commenting on Hulk Hogan’s entry/exit theme song)
“That’s my second favorite song”
Gorilla : “I’m almost afraid to ask – what’s your favorite?”
Brain : “All the rest are tied”

“Stu Hart trained all his kids–only three of them use the litter box.”

Heenan: I KNOW who the Assassin is!!!!
Schiavone: Tell us, Bobby, who?
Heenan: He’s the guy down at ringside wearing the mask!

(Talking about the Guerrero family)
“Their family is watching this at home wondering if the wheels are going to get stolen off their house.

Gorilla: “That was an illegal move!”
Brain: “No it wasn’t.”
PGorilla: “Yes it was!”
Brain: “No, it was a legal move, it was a Greco-Roman Hair Pull.”

“Have you ever been to Glens Falls? The city limits signs are on the same post.”

Vince: All Typhoon has to do is sit up and tag his partner.
Heenan: You’re asking a lot for Typhoon to do a sit-up.

During Undertaker match
Brain: C’mon ref. 1,2,3,4,5
Gorilla: What are you doing?
Brain: I’m showing ya. The referee could’ve broke the hold. He’s intimidated by that monster.
Gorilla: Why don’t you go down there and referee?
Brain: I’m needed here.

Ross: Back in Oklahoma, Bobby, we called a match like this a slobberknocker
Bobby: I thought that’s what they called the waitress at the Tip Top cafe in Downtown Tulsa.

Brain: Don’t touch that referee Perfect!
Gorilla: Why? A disqualification will save his title.
Brain: O.K. Then nail him!

(During the Rockers incident on the Barber Shop:)
As they were shaking hands: See, one without the other isn’t any good.
After the superkick: Oh, I knew he was going to do that. I just knew he was going to do that. He don’t need Jannetty.

“I know all about cheating. I’ve had six very successful marriages.”

“Do you know what ‘Ariba’ means. It means ‘Swim faster, the border gaurds are behind us”.

(At Royal Rumble ’92, Piper had just clotheslined Jake Roberts as he was about to DDT Flair)
Brain: “I never thought I’d say this, but thank you, Roddy! It’s a kilt! It’s not a skirt! It’s a kilt!”
(And after Piper had just kicked Flair as he had Roberts in the figure four seconds later)
Brain: “Why, you no-good freak! You skirt-wearing freak! It’s not a kilt, it’s a skirt!”

But who’s side is he on?

PURE GOLD! Wrestling announcing has never been the same since you left, Brain. If I left any out, post ‘em in the comments!


  • Buff Blogwell says:

    I remember one where I think Gorilla Monsoon, was talking about someone who had gotten pregnant (non-storyline, like some wrestler’s wife), and immediately Heenan goes “I never touched her!” That one has stuck with me.

  • Buff Blogwell says:

    Oh by the way, I had forgotten about this but Typhoon was a frequent target of the Brain. Here’s another one from the Internet:

    HEENAN: “You know, I could make a lot of money with Typhoon.”
    Ross: “How would you do that?”
    HEENAN: “Well, I wouldn’t have him wrestle. I’d take him to shopping centers and let kids ride him for a couple of bucks.”

  • pat13 says:

    I remember one back in the heydays of the Monday Night War. Perry Saturn was wrestling in a skirt or dress, and after his opponent hip-tossed him Heenan said, “I haven’t seen a skirt fly that high since the month end sale at Lucky Pierre’s”

  • Buff Blogwell says:

    I remember one back in the heydays of the Monday Night War. Perry Saturn was wrestling in a skirt or dress, and after his opponent hip-tossed him Heenan said, “I haven’t seen a skirt fly that high since the month end sale at Lucky Pierre’s”

    You know, not only did this line make me laugh, but I also forgot about Perry Saturn and the dresses in WCW. So I laughed twice.

  • dark-o says:

    was he a racist? about the mexican jokes he made

  • [...] dark-o writes in comments: was he [Bobby Heenan] a racist? about the mexican jokes he [...]

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